by Margot van Brakel | May 27, 2020 | de mens van morgen, homo conexus
Vandaag heb ik mijn auto verkocht. Mijn Mini, waar ik sinds 2014 met veel plezier in gereden heb. Sinds januari rij ik electrisch, en de Mini – met inmiddels veel kilometers op de teller – had zijn dienst gedaan.
Ik was niet voorbereid op het gevoel dat ik kreeg toen ik wegliep bij de ANWB, waar ik mijn auto achterliet. Een gevoel dat ik jaren geleden ook had. Alsof er een last van mijn schouders viel. Alsof ik ineens veel meer lucht kreeg. Alsof de zon meer dan normaal ging schijnen. En dat voor een auto. Ik heb niks met auto’s.
De mini en ik. Het was een mooie combi. Klein en wendbaar. Overzichtelijk. Ik ben heel blij met die auto geweest. Bij de keuze van een nieuwe auto, had ik maar een paar wensen. 100% electrisch – niet een beetje, maar all the way – , voldoende actieradius en niet te groot want hij moet goed passen op mijn vaste parkeerplek, waar ik ook nog twee fietsen heb staan. De auto koos ik uit op advies van de leasemeneer. Ik heb er niet in gereden; ik heb er niet eens in gezeten. Ik vertrouwde erop dat het wel ok zou zijn. Mijn eerste reactie, toen de auto afgeleverd werd, was ‘wat is ie groot!’. Maar met parkeercamera’s en overal piepjes kan ik er prima mee uit de voeten. Niet veel mensen zouden een auto zo kopen. Maar ik zei al, ik heb niks met auto’s.
Terug naar dat gevoel. Die verlichting. Vijf jaar geleden – ik had de mini toen nog geen jaar –had ik dat gevoel ook, toen ik besloot ik mijn relatie te verbreken. Omdat ik mijn leven wilde leiden op mijn eigen voorwaarden; me niet langer te richten op de verwachtingen van anderen. To stop living other people’s dreams, en de weg vrij te maken voor mijn eigen dromen.
Mijn partner had de mini voor mij uitgekozen; hij had wel iets met auto’s. De mini is solide en sportief; een auto waar hij wel in wilde rijden, zo af en toe. Ik vond het prima. Leuke auto voor iemand die niks heeft met auto’s.
En nu vandaag voel ik een opluchting als ik de mini achterlaat, die vergelijkbaar is met het gevoel van het moment waarop ik besloot mijn relatie te verbreken. Deze mini, hoe blij ik er ook mee ben geweest, had blijkbaar veel energie in zich, van iets waar ik afstand van wilde nemen. En vandaag realiseer ik me dat die mini het laatste ‘grote’ ding is, wat verbonden is aan ‘toen’. Het huis waar we samen in woonden, verkocht ik twee jaar geleden. Ook toen die verlichting. Inmiddels heb ik mijn eigen leven ingericht. Mijn eigen grote keuze’s gemaakt. Ik ben mijn eigen dromen aan het leven en voel de energie stromen als ik dicht bij mezelf blijf.
Hoe mooi is het om te luisteren naar je gevoel. Zonder woorden heeft het je veel te vertellen. Zoals vandaag. Het laat mij zien dat alles energie is. Positief of negatief. En dat het de kunst is om positieve energie de ruimte te geven en negatieve energie in je leven op te ruimen. De grote schoonmaak. Dit was de laatste stap. Dag mini.
PS: Dit is een mooi voorbeeld van ‘jezelf middenin een verhaal zetten’, waar deze video over ging.
Wil je op de hoogte blijven? Geef je emailadres door en we sturen je een update als we iets nieuws hebben.
by Margot van Brakel | Apr 16, 2020 | de mens van morgen, homo conexus
Today would have been amazing. I was so looking forward to this. To share my story and pass on the insights that have helped me so much.
But the universe took a different turn. Making today ‘just another day’ in the Corona lockdown period. So this morning I am sitting at my desk in the living room. Showing up for the work and starting the day with a blog. Writing as an alternative to speaking.
I have been thinking of what I can give you that would be of value. Not just today, but what could stay with you and be of value any day. It’s easy. In essence there is only one message that really matters. Just five words that say it all.
So this is what I would like to share with you. These five magical words. And please, pass it on. Because if we all understand and live these words, we will be in a good place. Whatever happens, we will know that we are in it together. You and me.
There is no better way of sharing these five words with you, than with the amazing short film that the French director and actress Maylis de Poncins made. In just two minutes:
Je suis donc tu es. That’s it. It says it all. I am because you are. We are in this life together. We are humans, social creatures. Our connectedness is part of who we are.
This video has helped me, with the powerful metaphor of the yellow and black balls, to instantly feel when a black ball situation is happening. And now I have a choice. I can catch the black ball and pass it on. Or … I can leave it where it is. Instead of catching it I share a yellow ball to turn the situation. It’s as easy as that.
Just take this image with you. And you’ll see that you too will be able to spot the black ball situations and turn them into something positive. Pass on positivity, and care for each other.
I am because you are. Thank you, for being you.
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by Margot van Brakel | Apr 6, 2020 | homo conexus, transformation
Or ‘How our rollercoaster ride turned into a snail trail’.
Slowly but surely our life is slowing down. There is no need to rush, to speed things up, to continue to run.
While a new reality is dawning, this slower pace allows us to see where we are.
It allows us to see what we need to see to redesign our life, our economy, our system.
To value nature, each other, connectedness and the diversity in humanity.
To realise it’s not stuff that makes us happy. It’s not things we need.
What we need is to be able to see the bigger picture.
To know we are in this together.
To feel connected and to do something that matters.
That’s all. It’s enough. We can save the world.
We see. We know. We feel. And then we do.
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by Margot van Brakel | Apr 3, 2020 | homo conexus, transformation
These are challenging times. Let’s make the most out of it, together. After a few weeks of chaos and going in different directions I have found my way back to where I am supposed to go. Unravelling the magic of transformation. And to be honest, I’m excited and eager to move forward.
And as working from home is the new normal, I have adjusted my working routine to make the most of my day. In the mornings I will be writing. Working on a new book about transformation power. But having written my first book last year, spending my days in isolation doesn’t work for me. I’ll stick to my own truth: as humans we stand out by our ability, but also our need to connect. And for sure, I am no exception to the rule.
I know that I need to connect with people, to keep touch with reality, to get new input and experiences that feed my insights. So you can help me.
Meet me
In the afternoons I invite you to meet with me. I’ll share my expertise, my experience, my insights. I’ll give you advice or feedback. We can work on a plan together. We can brainstorm. I can be your personal mentor. It’s up to you. If you know me, you’ll know how I can help. If you don’t, then this website or other writings may give you an idea, or just give it a go, and see what it brings you.
These meetings, of course, are free and online, using Zoom.
I learn, you learn and together we grow.
by Margot van Brakel | Mar 11, 2020 | de mens van morgen, homo conexus, human potential, transformation
I like challenges. I’m in for the big ones, because “I believe as many as six impossible things before breakfast”. This may get you puzzled; don’t worry, you’re not the first. So let me help you: nothing = impossible. It all starts with believing. ‘I have a dream’, and thank god, we all can dream.
Seeing how we are stuck today, in our never-ending focus on performance and perfection, I have a dream that one day we will find ourselves and live life to the fullest, making way for our potential. Not because we have to be our best, but because we are becoming who we are. Which, according to philosopher Friedrich Nietzsche, is our purpose in life. And with all I know and feel, I tend to agree.
Stuck huh? Yeah, stuck. Our mental health is on an all-time low. There are different issues. For one it’s our idea of how we are supposed to be. Our idea of normal. Normal has become a very slim concept. Strangely, it’s not so normal to fit the normal brief anymore. We seem to have a diagnose for everyone (OCD, ASS, ADHD to name a few). There even is a mental illness that we call ‘snapchat dysmorphia’, for people who want to look like their perfect snapchat picture – with filters – and who go to a doctor to make this happen.
In schools we train our children to perform well. You could even argue that we are ‘programming’ our children. Just have a look at this video and you can see what I mean. And we measure the performance to ensure that our kids improve.
The benchmark is the holy grail and tells us what performance we should be looking for. So what happens to our special talents if we all need do ‘the same dance’? The only dance we’ll be able of dancing will be a dance that robots – at some point – will be doing better than us. Did you know that artificial intelligence is going to exceed our human intelligence?
So we could ask ourselves this question: Are we – humans – the failing prototype of what we will improve with artificial intelligence?
I dare say no! Maybe in our current view, being homo sapiens. Literally this means wise man. But being wise – on the long run – is no longer what makes us stand out.
It’s time to rethink our own position. Time for a transformation to become who we are born to be: connected. You, me, us, we are Homo Conexus. We distinguish ourselves by our ability, but also our need, for being connected.
So this is my big project. A lifetime of transformation. To see ourselves in a different light. A light that shines bright and sparkles with our great potential. A light that shines so bright it can embrace us all. If only we can learn to see. Seeing is believing. And we can start seeing in our dreams.
Notes:
1. On 10 September my TED talk at TEDxWassenaar will was about this topic. See the talk here.
2. Dutch readers can read my book ‘De mens van morgen; van homo sapiens naar homo conexus‘
3. On my website you can find a brief English summary of the book.
